The candidate

Pilot fish is hiring a desktop support tech, and his boss sends him the resume of a guy who, the boss says, should be pretty good.

"I read the resume and, except for a few glaring shortcomings, the guy does look promising," says fish. "I give the guy a call and explain the job, salary and hours, and the guy sounds excited to be given the opportunity since the company he is working for is shutting down shortly."

Fish schedules an interview, and a week later the candidate arrives -- and while fish isn't overly impressed by the guy, he walks him up to the the IT conference room and begins the interview.

At first the candidate is quiet and courteous. But as the interview progresses, his attitude slowly changes -- he keeps demanding to know why the details of the job are the way they are.

When fish points out that the new hire is to be paid on an hourly basis, the candidate explodes.

"Why is this job hourly?!?" candidate asks.

Because someone in HR determined it was, fish explains.

"But why?!" candidate asks.

I don't know why, fish says. It might have something to do with the fact that you don't have to have a degree, nor do you have to have any certifications.

"What?" candidate says. "Just because I don't have a degree or any certifications means I'm not qualified for my job? That's @#$%! I don't believe in certifications!"

No, fish says matter-of-factly, that's why this job is hourly. I don't set the rules. You need to take that up with HR.

Candidate just looks down and says, "This interview is over" -- and fish agrees.

Later that day, fish is telling the story to a co-worker -- and midway through, the co-worker starts laughing.

What's so funny? fish asks.

"I was standing here last week when you were explaining the job to the guy," co-worker says. "You told him then that it was hourly. In fact, you asked him if the hourly pay was high enough and he told you then that it was great.

"Dang, I think we missed hiring a psycho. Just think of all the fun we could have had!"

Sharky's idea of fun doesn't involve psychos -- I'd rather read true tales of IT life. Send yours to me at sharky@computerworld.com. You'll score a sharp Shark shirt if I use it. Add your comments below, and read some great old tales in the Sharkives.

The Best of Shark Tank includes more than 70 tales of IT woe submitted by you, our readers, since 1999. Which all goes to prove, conclusively, that hapless users and idiotic bosses are indeed worldwide phenomena. Free registration is all that's needed to download The Best of Shark Tank (PDF).