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Ballmer, dead parrots, and dead deals
9 comments- TAGS:Ballmer, deal Yahoo, Icahn, merger, Microsoft
- IT TOPICS:Enterprise Software & Services, Government & Regulation, Internet, Management, Windows & Microsoft
What part of "Yahoo doesn't want a thing to do with you" did Ballmer not get? The new lord and master of Microsoft seems to be deaf, as well as dumb, in his latest attempt to try to buy Yahoo.
Microsoft, along with billionaire investor Carl Icahn, who at 72 seems to be losing his business smarts, confirmed that they still wanted to buy Yahoo. All that Yahoo has to do, to get in on this new deal, is fire its board of directors.
In other words: "Dear Yahoo leadership. You recently turned our offer down to buy your company. Then, you decided to turn down our offer to buy the search part of your company. Please quit your jobs so we can replace you with people who will take our lowball offer. Thank you very much. Ballmer and Icahn."
Just how stupid is Ballmer? The deal is dead.
With apologies to Monty Python, The deal is not pinin'! The deal passed on! This deal is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-DEAL!!
For over a month now Icahn has been trying to drum up support for a hostile take over of the Yahoo board. It hasn't worked. Now, for reasons beyond me, Ballmer and Icahn are trying to get people excited about a deal strategy that's already failed. To paraphrase the Dead Parrot sketch again, "Mate, this deal wouldn't "voom" if you put four million volts through it! 'E's bleedin' demised!"
The only thing that Ballmer has managed to do in this whole mess is to force Yahoo into Google's arms. Good going Ballmer, in your irrational hatred of Google, you made your dumbest move ever by making Google's online advertising business even stronger!
Way to go guy! And, now, you're showing that you can't even learn from your own mistakes.
Don't you have anything better to do Ballmer? Say, trying to get Windows Seven done as fast as possible?
Remember, you read it here first kids: Fire Ballmer.
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