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Sharky

Shark Tank

Shark Tank: And that answers a lot of questions right there

This big utility company has an, um, diverse IT support group, and it's getting a new manager, says a pilot fish on the scene.

"The new guy has a reputation for being a corporate man who does things by the book," fish says. "At our first group get-together to meet the new boss, we go though the normal intros: 'how I work, what I expect,' yada yada."

Then the boss opens the floor to questions. And one of the more, um, astute IT employees has one.

Why can't I access Web sites that have to do with marijuana using my office PC? he asks.

Boss: Marijuana?

Astute guy: I'm doing research.

Boss: You do know the corporate policy regarding Internet use.

Astute guy: Of course.

Reports fish, "The new boss just shakes his head and asks our researcher to see him in his office after the meeting."

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What People Are Saying

Is this true? Can someone be

Is this true? Can someone be that stupid?

The corporate policy

The corporate policy regarding Internet use..and an online business is developing...Try to manage an corporate on the internet,you might receive more~
Welcome to AmeriChinaB2B( http://www.acb2b.com/ ) to begin your business trip of China,the world's fastest-growing economy and the world's most populous nation.

and my underwear are brown

and my underwear are brown because I can't climb high enough to get out of the BS you guys are slinging!

I knew a guy who tried to

I knew a guy who tried to sharpen his saw after he dropped some Woodstock brown acid. Poor guy ended up cutting off his left hand. He thought it was the monster that lived under his bed when he was a kid.

vielen Dank !

vielen Dank !

You walk up to me like a

You walk up to me like a camel
and you frown
your eyes in your pockets and
your nose on the ground.

You should not try to hit your target if you are stoned. You might miss and hit something you didn't mean to hit.

OK Oldest Timer... Ich gebe

OK Oldest Timer...

Ich gebe oben.
Bitte übersetzen Sie!

The Best I came up with is...

Original:
----------
Sie gehen bis zu mir wie einem Kamel und Sie runzeln, Ihre Augen in Ihren Taschen, Ihre Nase aus den Grund die Stirn.

Translation:
-------------
They go up to me like a camel and you runzeln, your eyes in its bags, your nose out of the reason the forehead.

OR
---

They go wrinkling to me like a camel and you, your eyes in your pockets, your nose out of the reason the forehead.

------------------------------------

Original (2nd Phrase):
-------------------------
Sie sollten nicht versuchen, Ihr Ziel zu schlagen, wenn Sie gesteinigt sind. Sie dürften verpassen und dürften etwas schlagen, das Sie nicht sollten.

Translation
------------
They should not try to strike your goal if you are gesteinigt. They might something strike, which you should not miss and might.

OR
-----

They should not try to strike your goal if you are gesteinigt. You drften miss and strike drften something, should not that you.

--------

Dankt Viel!

Where is the cowgirl? If you

Where is the cowgirl?

If you don't find todays story funny, you have no sense of humor.

Sie sollten nicht versuchen, Ihr Ziel zu schlagen, wenn Sie gesteinigt sind. Sie dürften verpassen und dürften etwas schlagen, das Sie nicht sollten.

Some people are that astute.

Some people are that astute. A few years ago, our CEO announced a company-wide drug at a meeting of the headquarters employees. One of the vice presidents asked when testing would begin. None of us that remembered him asking the question were suprirsed when he left the company abruptly.

0/0... more than once I have

0/0... more than once I have shouted at my source code, "Do what I want you to do, not what I tell you to do!!"