Wrong, wrong, wrong!

Dude, Where's My Van?

This IT shop uses a dull, brownish van to deliver new equipment to remote sites. "We finished one job early, and rather than go straight back to the office, we sat outside with a cup of coffee, and then we spotted a car wash," says a pilot fish there. "We decided to put the van into the car wash to pass a bit of time. We actually washed it four times, as it was a bit mucky." That's how they discover that the van isn't a brownish color -- it's bright orange. But the next day, the fish is called into the boss's office because no one can find the van. "I went out and pointed to the van," fish says. "They didn't believe it was ours until they tried the keys. In the next five years, it was never washed again and reverted back to its natural dirty color."

But That Was Back Before Lunch

This sysadmin pilot fish is busy reimaging some laptops when the boss comes in with a question: "I got an e-mail from PayPal saying I sent money to this person, but I don't even know who this person is. There was a link in the e-mail to log into my account, so I tried to do that, but I can't get the page to come up. Can you fix it?" Incredulous fish gives boss a look. You know you're not supposed to click on links in e-mails, especially e-mails that are most likely spoofed, right? he says. "Yes," replies boss. And do you remember the security presentation that we both saw just this morning, where a user did exactly the same thing and wound up with an infected PC? "Yes," replies boss -- who sheepishly walks away.

Unclear on the Concept

It's the mid-1970s, and this student pilot fish has a part-time job picking up and delivering punch cards for a computer service company. "One day, I picked up a set of cards from a customer who desired additional info to be put on their cards," fish says. "I examined the card; all columns on the card were in use. I explained that adding this info would require introducing another card into the mix. They responded by pointing out that there obviously was enough space between the holes and that by simply moving the holes closer together, we could certainly add at least two new holes to the card. I stuttered some muddled response and staggered on my way."

Should That Be Three Separate Tickets?

Support pilot fish receives a trouble ticket from a user with a straightforward request: "We need to open some very old files that were created in Lotus 1, 2 and 3."

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